Sunday, March 1, 2015

documentary special long lost family

I just  watched a special on The Learning Channel and titled long lost family. To investigators help three adoptees find their biological families. All three situations had a very positive outcome

Despite the fact that neither my biological mother nor my biological father want a relationship with me, I have to say the following: if I had to choose the five happiest days of my lice, two of them would involve my biological family.

One of the five happiest days was the day that I met my birth mother, the second of my five happiest days was today in June 1989 when my birth mother arranged a small Reunion where I met my half sister, my birth mother's husband, one of my aunts, and my maternal grandmother. My partner bill was with me.

That was and still to this day was the only family reunion I have ever experienced in my lifetime.shortly after meeting everybody I moved to Indiana with Bill. Any effort to stay in touch with birth mother was solely my own effort. None of the others ever reached out to me again. I guess my only regret would be that in retrospect I would have started a pen pal relationship with my maternal aunt as well as my maternal grandmother.

But why should I be the only one making the effort? None of them ever contacted me again except I did see my birth mother a few more times. I saw my sister two more times, she does not want a relationship with me.

I said hello to my niece on Facebook last week she doesn't I don't know if she knows whether or not I exist so I just said a couple of sentences and she elected not to respond so I will not contact her again.

The point of the post was to tell you about the documentary and also to tell you that despite the fact that I would describe my situation is not having any family at all so still were some of the best two days of my life

Second hand store bling

A little bit of bling

Beautiful things at the second hand shop

Aren't these sandals gorgeous? I got hooked on second hand shopping back in 1990 when my partner and I moved to Indiana and we live right next door to the goodwill. I got these at savers for just $4 and I felt like showing them off to you :-)

looking back at February 9th 1996

I am staying in violets home. I called around to different churches to let them know that I was in a very dangerous situation staying in someone's home named jack. Jack is an Orthodox Jew with a violent temper and whenever I brought food into the house that he deemed was not kosher he would get really angry and he would blow up with me and he would tell me to get that food out of his house. He had an obvious mental illness and told me that he stalks women so I was scared of him and I have been actively planning my escape.

I decided to contact the Unitarian Church in Baltimore City and have the pastors make an announcement about woman in danger needs room to rent even if on a temporary basis .so Ingrid responded but said that it would be on a month to month basis. It is a very hellish situation she stays up till 2 a.m. And she's up at six in the morning and her dogs start barking very early in the morning. I am having excruciating paralyzing back pain that I do not yet know is fibromyalgia. She keeps the health very cold so that aggravates my problem.I feel lonely in her environment it is most certainly not a home and she wants me to hurry up and get out as quickly as I can. I have very little income and no's been a lonely week but I'm not going to get together with Ben just to use him he is a very talented musician and I can't even really remember where we met I got together with him last Saturday evening because I really thought I did enjoy his company and they did but I realize that communication is deplorable between us he is not at all an educated guy

It's ironic I am standing in front of the Sony theater and there are a group of developmentally disabled adults who just left theater I'm pretty certain they were they are with the organization chimes who I once worked for and they jipped me out of thousands of dollars worth of wages

The sadness did not set in today until I went to the Rotunda and my friend Jackie who works at TCBY yogurt can't even seem to find 10 minutes to connect with me she said she just doesn't have the energy to talk to me

I called Chris to see if he would like to go to the patches and Liz coffee house tomorrow night but he hasn't returned my call if he doesn't work call return my call by late tonight then I'll have to ask someone else it's an ordeal huge ordeal to get out there with no vehicle maybe I'll ask Maxine. Even when I was young and did have a car I always had difficulty finding friends who shared enough of my interests and wanted to accompany me to these various parts things that I love to do

Often I noticed violence as soon as I leave the house there was a lady in the 7-Eleven in Hamden who had a black eye she was a junkie and told me that she had been punched out by her boyfriend. Then I got the Hopkins University because I needed to go through the Blue Book of colleges and find out which universities offer a Masters in Social Work at least if I were able to go back to college I would have some sense of stability in my life the security guard at the college told me that if I don't show him my drivers license he'll beat me over the head with a baseball bat, that was his idea of humor and I was truly not amused.

A woman named Phyllis H called today to ask me how I was doing she offered me a $100 loan from the church kitty at her church I'm sick of my whole life having to be a damn emergency. I've could have gone to support group tonight in Catonsville at 6 p.m. But I didn't have any transportation...

Saturday, February 28, 2015

correction to the post about migraines

blogging on a smartphone is absolutely crazy and it is very difficult to get things to appear the same way they would if you were typing.

The correction that I would like to make is that it was supposed to say from 2009 until 2011 in my one bedroom apartment in Hampstead Maryland...

enjoying the support


4 0 Years I was completely alone with this issue. I am thrilled to have discovered this organization yesterday I read all about the noisy dozen awards.

The director of the organization always gets back to me within 48 hours whenever I send him an email about anything that is on my mind regarding the way noise pollution is affecting my life. You will be surprised at how much you will learn by going to this website, this is some considered to be a problem that is causing extremely severe health problems in Americans.

migraine and sleep deprivation

   doesn't seem that I am sleeping any more than a few minutes a night. What appears to be happening is I sleep for a few minutes I'm awake for 2 hours I sleep for another 5 minutes I'm awake for a few hours again. Every night is horrific nightmares in there are more symptoms as well that I have been discussing in my facebook support groups. .i AM PTSD so I know that that is contributing to how little I sleep and the fact that the sleep with such poor quality. Of course people with fibromyalgia don't usually get more than 2 or 3 hours of sleep a night so there are a lot of things going on.

I found out that my insurance totally covers having a sleep study.

In a few days I have my appointment.   like a consult. They give patients the option of either just coming in and doing the sleep study right away or having an appointment first to discuss concerns or questions.

I have had a migraine every day for the lAst 2 months. It waxes and wanes in severity.  the medicine helps to a certain degree,but I just don't know what can be causing these migraines.

Obviously the fact that I sleep so little can definitely contribute, obviously when I had chainsmokers living below me that was a huge factor but they don't live down there anymore.

If I had 75 dollars I would buy  a mold test kit. in my last 2 months in my one bedroom apartment in Hampstead Maryland was when I discovered that that apartment had a very severe mold problem. One of my neighbors discovered it in her unit and little by little it was determined that most of the units had bad mold. But the owners denied the severity of the problem and did not want to spend any money on trying to get rid of it

 .i my lungs hurt my throat is sore a lot my voice is raspy so it is possible that when the maintenance man flooded my apartment by busting water heater that mold Grew, on the other hand this is a very dry climate so I just simply do not know.

But the sleep deprivation and the migraines are definitely a huge contributor to being at 80 to90% homebound.there is such unpredictability with my health that I missed 3 appointments in 3 days last week. I would love to go back to work part time but I'm going to have to start with just one day a week because I don't want to set myself up in a job where I'm constantly missing work due to illness. This is a huge advantage of going through vocational rehabilitation they already know in advance what your disabilities and limitations are.